it's a revolution

Sunday, August 17, 2008

I’m afraid of change. I’m afraid of the unknown. I don’t like uncertainty.

I need routine, normalcy, and regularity. But sometimes, thats not so easy. This year is the year of change, the year of the unknown, and more uncertainty then I’ve ever experienced.

Some people love change, they love the rush it gives them. For me, its terrible. A planner runs my life, and without it, I panic. But if I let the fear of change run my life, where will I go? I’ll be stuck is this eternal pit of adequate. As much as I don’t like it, I have to break out of this cycle and reach for something. I think the reason I dont like change is because its easy, easy to be adequate. If I break the circle, I think, I’m afraid I’ll fail.

Failure isn’t acceptable. It’s not allowed. But at the same time, its necessary. I guess when I allow myself to fail, then I’ll be able to tolerate change. So, I have to jump - into the unknown and hope that all my planning and routine catches me, and allows me to change.

Tonight we’re standing on our knees
To fight for what we worked for all these years
The battle was long, it’s the fight of our lives
Will we stand up champions tonight?
It was the night things changed
Can you see it now?
When the walls that they put up to hold us back fell down
It’s a revolution, throw your hands up, cause we never gave in
We’ll sing halleluia

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I love hearing from all of you and greatly appreciate all your feedback and comments! xx Kristen

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