The beginning of reality?

Friday, January 16, 2009

Recently, I’ve been having these reoccurring dreams. I mean they’re nothing special like the dreams Joseph interpreted for the king, but I feel like they mean something, maybe. The strange thing is, is that they’re the same, the same people, the same situations, over and over again. It’s been over a week now, and every night as I lay my head down to sleep, I fear that the dream I hate having, will occur, and once again, I won’t want to wake, because my dreams are better than reality. I don’t really understand dreams, I’d like to think that they have some alternative meaning that one day will reveal itself, but until then, I guess it’s just me and my dreams.

I don’t wanna dream about
All the things that never were
Maybe I can live without
When I’m out from under
I don’t wanna feel the pain
What good would it do me now
I’ll get it all figured out
When I’m out from under

I started this blog with a mantra that I wanted to (hopefully) carry out throughout this entire thing, and it was:

“To be nobody but your self in a world which is doing its best night and day to make you everybody else, means to fight the hardest battle which any human being can fight.”

I never really explained what that means, and well I guess it’s pretty self-explainable, so hopefully everyone can see that ideal running through my blog with the strongest force.

Being in college has definitely made me rethink everything that defines who I am. And, while Pepperdine does a great job of allowing me to be secure in myself, it’s also has challenged me in areas I never thought possible. I never would have imagined that at a Christian school, my faith would be challenged or that my values would be questioned. It comes to a point, I think, in everyone’s life where you have to decide who you are, and never stop fighting for that. And, I think it’s something that if we’re not careful of, will get lost.

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I love hearing from all of you and greatly appreciate all your feedback and comments! xx Kristen

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