dreaming big.

October 20, 2008

i cannot let myself be afraid of limits. i cannot let myself fear the unknown. i cannot limit myself to the security blanket i’ve so comfortably created. i cannot let my dreams die due to the fact that they might be ‘too big.’

wanna know what i dream? that one day ill move to new york to experience the big apple and maybe realize that i can make it, that i am good enough. maybe ill realize that i’m nothing more than a west coast girl who needs happy people and sunshine. but is it really fair to let the fears that i cannot make it stop me? i dream that one day i’ll be a writer at a big time magazine, where people follow my stories and respect me for my knowledge of my craft. i dream that one day, ill be editor in chief at vogue; that i’ll be cool enough to have a book written about me and my bitchy antics.

i cant stop dreaming. i’m 21 years old, and if i stop dreaming now, and stop reaching for my goals, then what’s going to happen when i’m 30, 40, 50?

i have to stop being afraid to dream big, and bigger. i have to exceed expectations and not just meet them. i have to believe in myself and who i am, that i can achieve thoe dreams.

this whole, being a senior thing, really freaks me out. i don’t do change. i hate change. but i need change. i need a chance to see if i’m good enough. i need to realize that my dream of new york could actually be a reality if i make it one. that just because i graduate and walk across that stage doesn’t mean i’m a grown up. i have to accept the fact that i’m not going to stay a 21 year old college sorority girl forever and that maybe being a 26 year old working girl is okay too. that life doesn’t end after colleges and neither do the friendships.

change is going to come, and dreams are going to be explored. i just hope when i’m given the chance to take on my dream, that my reality exceeds my dreams.

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I love hearing from all of you and greatly appreciate all your feedback and comments! xx Kristen