I'm jealous.

August 25, 2009

I'm sitting here watching Zoey 101 and the only reason I am, is because it's filmed at Pepperdine and by watching it, I feel like I'm a little closer to home. Today is the beginning of New Student Orientation at Pepperdine. Last year I was a NSO counselor, cheerfully greeting 800 anxious, new freshman as they were about to start their adventure at Pepperdine. I meet all kinds; nervous, excited, arrogant, amazing, beautiful, all of them with big hearts ready to start their college career. And today, it all starts again, except I don't get to see it. I don't get to experience it.

Everyone's starting school. Yesterday I met Whitney and Afton down at ASU to grab coffee and I was so jealous. The rush of the first day back. You can smell the excitement, the new books, the curiosity of a new boy in class, new friends, new clothes, a fresh start. To me the first day back is this new opportunity to start new, regardless of the fact that it might be your senior year. It's a chance to clear the slate and begin again. It's a deep breath, its one big step towards something great and I'm jealous. I'm jealous of everyone starting back up. I'm jealous of the new, fun things they're going to experience this year. I would do pretty much anything to be a senior at Pepperdine again. Maybe this is me, living in the past, not accepting the future, refusing to move on... blah blah blah, but I do. I miss it, I'm living in my past. I'm wishing I was back in Malibu, Villa Malibu 223 to be exact, about to start my adventure. And maybe that's the challenge of this whole growing up thing. It's finding my new deep breath, my new big step. It really is all about living in my present and my future - It's about growing up. I guess the thing I'm struggling with the most is that I miss my Pepperdine friends. I miss my amazing roommates, Kate&Kate, all my beautiful sorority sisters. I miss running into people at Starbucks & Ralph's. I miss the people I got to see every day in the Com building. I miss my professors. I miss the routine of it all. I miss the daily grind. I just miss Malibu, and guess it comes down to the fact that I'm jealous that other people are there experiencing it all and I can't seem to admit that its all over.

Carly and I used to watch X Factor try-outs on Youtube for hours, lame, I know, but I love them. I watched a couple today and this one was amazing. Enjoy (click here) - I get by with a little help from my friends.

1 comment

  1. Kristen...we miss you too#1 and #2: you are the reason every time i step on that campus I PURPOSEFULLY try to breathe it all in because you have MADE me appreciate it. Literally opened my eyes to the beauty of malibu, school, college, and being a 21 yr old. thanks for doing it before it was too late and please realize that you are all around Malibu in memory to those who love you.


I love hearing from all of you and greatly appreciate all your feedback and comments! xx Kristen